Oxthink

I take pride in my individuality. It’s what makes me different. It’s what makes me special.

I will have my own ideas; I will do my own thing. Those thoughts and behaviours are unique to me. They’re what make me who I am. Nobody else is me. I’m one of a kind.

Or, at least, that’s what I used to think.

Now I’m not so sure.

I’m starting to think that perhaps I’m really not that special; that there’s actually not much difference between us all.

Increasingly, it seems that we’re all tending to say the same things; we’re all tending to like the same things; we’re all tending to do the same things.

So often, we talk in clichés, we follow trends and fashions, we will copy each other’s mannerisms, we watch the same programmes, we buy the same things, we visit the same places, we’re most comfortable when we’re part of a crowd.

There really isn’t that much uniqueness around.

And I’m just as caught up in that ordinariness as everyone else.

So, although I might feel special and I might try to convince myself that I am special, I’m actually not that much different from everyone else.

And yet, feeling special and having some belief in our individuality is important. It gives value to our lives. It helps to justify our existence. I’m bringing something to the party.

Without that spark of individuality, I would make no or little impression on the world. I might just as well not be here. Somebody – anybody – else could be me.

Being an individual means that I am different; being different means that I’m an individual. I have something about me; something that separates me from everyone else. As an individual, nobody else thinks or does exactly as me. And that’s what should make me so special.

Admittedly, that specialness does sometimes mean that I believe I can out-think others; that I’m smarter than them; that I know better than them. On most occasions, I am proven wrong. How many times have I decided to do something, thinking that it would buck the trend, only to find that lots of other people have also decided to do that something?

“I thought the place would be quiet!”

“I thought we’d be the only ones here!”

A good example of this is deciding when I should buy the food for the Christmas holidays. It’s a big shop. Everybody will be doing it. When is the best time to go in order to avoid the queues? When is the best time to ensure that I get everything I need? I will be trying to out-think others,

“I’ll go then because most people will be going at this other time!”

And yet there are still lots of people shopping at my chosen time. They have all thought the same as me!

If my thoughts are special, how can others have the same thoughts as me? Perhaps there are only a limited number of thoughts going around!

Or perhaps our thought processes are becoming more alike. Individuality and distinctiveness is declining. As a society, as a species, we’re homogenising.

The more that the inputs we receive are the same then the more likely we, as individuals, are going to think and do the same. The world is becoming smaller. There are fewer sources of information coming our way. Global branding, corporate conglomerates, the mass media, the internet all mean that we are in receipt of less diverse messaging and influences.

What goes into the pot determines what comes out of the pot. If we mix the same ingredients we’re going to keep getting the same cake.

The individual is being overwhelmed by larger organisations and advancing technologies.

We may not always realise the extent of our submission. Sometimes we can believe we are being individual but in reality we are being controlled, manipulated and directed by some more compelling force that we aren’t entirely aware of. Our thoughts and behaviours are being surreptitiously conditioned and shaped.

Perhaps this is the case with my Christmas shopping – the supermarkets have used some subtle influencing to lure me and others to a different shopping time in order to spread their footfall and ease the pressure on other busier times.

And the clever part of it is that I think I’ve made the decision as to when I should do my Christmas shopping! That’s one of the great triumphs of the system; it operates in such a way that we still think we’re in control, we still think that the individual is supreme.

Of course, we’re a long way off from a total loss of independence, from being complete clones. Individuals can still have unique thoughts. After all, that’s what, as a species, drives our creativity, discovery, science and invention.

And yes, given the advances we’re making in these areas it would seem that there is no shortage of imaginative, perceptive and ingenious thinking. The problem is that this is not the norm. Most of us seem to belong to the collective masses where we’re going to think, say and do the same as everyone else.

That’s not somewhere I particularly want to be. I want to be a bit more individual. I want to be known for being me.

That leads me to ask whether or not I should deliberately try to be a bit different? How do I properly differentiate myself? How do I stop myself thinking the same as everyone else? How should I go out of my way to stand out from the crowd?

And how far should I push it? In a society where we crave acceptance and belonging, there’s a fine line between being an independent, free-thinker and being an oddball, misfit or maverick.

Or, reconciling myself to a life of unoriginality and banality, should I just accept that I’m nothing special, that I’m the same as everyone else? Should I just let myself be absorbed into the masses?

Why is it so difficult to be me? Why is it so difficult to be the person I want to be?